A Fallen Angel
by pjo.fandam
Summary: At the worst point in Newt's memory, he really needed Thomas by his side. But as life gets in the way (and Teresa), they seem to see one another less and less. A peek into Newt's mind post-fall.


His tears rolled down his face once again, as if happiness in his life was non existent. He looked somewhat older; bags under his eyes, tattered clothes. Though he had been abused mentally, there was one thing in his terrifying life that he seemed to have held onto. Hope. Hope that one day, he would be free from the hell he was living. Hope that one day, someone would come and save him. And so he lay, closed his eyes and the world darkened.

He woke to the sound of voices. Petrified, he didn't move, that is, until he heard the sweet voice. It was Thomas.

He opened his eyes, in fear of what he was going to see. Never before had he felt this terrified of seeing his boyfriend's face. But instead, the worry in Thomas' eyes and the quiver of his lips showed concern, something Newt has never seen before. He had assumed that Thomas would be mad at him, but instead...

"Hey," he whispered, "Are you alright?"

Newt's heart rate slowly decreased as he heard the soft voice. He was in too much pain to move, so he simply nodded, a tear cascading down his cheek. Thomas moved slightly to wipe it away, and Newt smiled. What did he do to deserve someone like Thomas? He didn't know. But he knew that he must've been the luckiest boy in the Glade. Thomas moved again, this time to lay next to Newt.

Newt only just realised where he was: he was concentrating too much on Thomas. Or was out just the right amount? He was in a comfy bed in the med jack hut.

"You still haven't told me what actually happened out there?" Thomas whispered, seeing Newt deep in thought.

"In time, Tommy. When the time is right."

Thomas nodded his head ever so slightly, his hand moving up to Newt's face yet again to wipe away a tear. However, Newt realised he wasn't crying anymore. The distance between them had closed so their faces were only centimetres apart. Before Newt realised, he and Thomas were kissing, and after what just happened to him, he really needed to feel as if someone in this distopian universe of utter hell cared for him.

"WHAT THE SHUCKIN' HELL IN GOING ON HERE?!"

Newt recognised the voice immediately. Minho. He and Thomas broke apart immediately only to see Minho smirk and go away.

"Where were we?" Thomas whispered.

And so they continued for god knows how long, only to be broken apart the next morning when the doors of the maze opened.

*

It had been three days since he fell. It still hurt in places, mostly his leg as he still couldn't walk yet. It's not that he couldn't, Thomas just wouldn't let him. Said he needed as much rest as he could get until he had to work in the gardens again. Newt laughed at the thought, then cringed since he was on his own with nothing to laugh about.

Thomas is still on his run, he thought.

Newt tried to get up and walk around so he didn't become lazy, but the second he tried to balance himself, he slipped onto the floor- where he seemed to stay for the next hour or two.

Newt hadn't tried to walk after that, but had given up altogether. Thomas visited less and less.At first, Newt was worried but he soon got used to it.Why would he want to waste his time on me, anyway, Newt thought. Of course, the boy has better things to do than nursing for a sick, wimpy boy who can't even deal with the fact that we're here. In reality, however, Alby had told Thomas to focus on being a Runner more since he was slacking, which ended up taking more time than either of them would've wanted.

Newt looked about the med jack hut where he had been bed-bound. There was a girl in a coma on the bed opposite him; the only girl in the glade. From what he knew, her name was Teresa, and for some reason, he was slightly jealous of this unconscious girl. The problem was, he didn't know why.

Later that day, Thomas walked in, a smug smile plastered across his face. Newt's face lit up at the sight of his goofy boyfriend once again. However, he looked towards him questioningly as he walked towards Teresa's bed. He sat in the chair next to her and held her hand for a good minute or two; his eyes closed, as if he was deep in concentration. Without even looking in his direction, Thomas left, and with that, Newt let the salty tears drop down his face yet again.

*

3 months later

Newt was walking again and working in the gardens but anyone could easily see the tension between him and his boyfriend. But Newt wasn't afraid of the gladers recognising it, he was afraid of her seeing it. Her name was poison to his lips. Teresa. She was no good. He'd hated her while she was still in a coma, then scolded himself for feeling that way about anyone. Newt thought that if she knew, then she'd swoop in and steal Thomas from him. Not that she hadn't already. Thomas doesn't spend time with him anymore. A mere glance he could steal from across the glade, but that's all. Nothing more, nothing less. But that's just the way it is.

The bags under his eyes were more visible than they had been a few weeks ago. His eyes were red and puffy from crying. Something that had become normal recently. No one ever consoled him anymore, and for some reason, he preferred it that way. To him, it wasn't compassion, nor was it sympathy or empathy. No. To him, it was pity. They pitied him and he hated that.But this time he was malcontent for a different reason. Not because of how muted everything seemed without Thomas, but because now he knew. He knew what was really going on; what he had been too blinded by love to see for himself. Newt had lost Thomas. He wasn't dead or injured, but Newt couldn't say he hadn't wished that was the case when he found out. The way he found out was even worse. Thomas had left him... for her.

Now he knew that girl was poisonous. She had ruined his life. The only person keeping him sane had now been taken from him by the snake. The thought of how he saw them kissing as if there was no tomorrow, making a fool out of him. He couldn't take it anymore. He wouldn't.

He was sat alone at dinner for the fifth time this week, not an unusual occurrence. He looked over at the happy couple and saw something surprising. Thomas had stolen a glance... at HIM. Newt's heart raced for a spilt second, until Thomas looked away again, lips pursed. And was he blushing? Now Newt was determined: he was not going to let Teresa steal Thomas from him. And so the plan was formed...

Newt knew Thomas well enough to know his routine. He would only ever come out of the maze just before it shut. Newt chuckled at the thought of what he used to call him. Drama Queen.

It was an ordinary day for the two boys. Thomas had just run out from the maze at the very last second, panting and sweating. He was smirking at his boyfriend who threw water onto his face. "Are you not gonna ask if I'm okay, sweetie? I could've got stuck in there!"

Newt laughed,"You say that every day, Tommy, and yet, here we are."

Thomas kissed him on the cheek before sprinting off towards the map room, leaving Newt chuckling like mad.

After his little memory, Newt got up from the table at dinner and went to his cabin. Thomas watched him every step until the door closed. He excused himself from the table, having Teresa let go of his arm (finally), and walked over to Newt's cabin. He could tell he was upset, he always was these days. But today, for some reason, it was different. He seemed to have been deep in thought, as if remembering something nice. A smile had crept onto Newt's face. And Thomas knew that he was the only one to make Newt smile like that. Little did Thomas know what was actually going to happen.

*

Thomas paused for a minute before knocking on Newt's door. What was he doing? He hadn't talked to the guy in 3 months and now he suddenly castes about him. Obviously Thomas knew why; he still loved Newt. Not Teresa.

He had no clue as to what made him go to Teresa that day but he knew that she'd talked to him, which made him curious. So he kept her close by. Teresa had told him to keep away from Newt, so to make himself seen trustworthy to her, he did as he was told. No matter how much it broke him to not even look at Newt as he left that day.

Thomas broke out of his thoughts and quietly knocked on the door. It had been left slightly ajar so he opened it further, only to hear a loud creak middle the quietest of sobs. Oh no. Was this his fault? Had he broken the one person here who he loved the most? Thomas could never let that happen. "Hey," he found himself murmuring.

A quiet voice replied, "Hey, Thomas."

Thomas felt as if he'd been impaled right in the heart. Newt has never called him 'Thomas' before. He only ever called him 'Tommy'. Then it was true. He had broken Newt. It was at that point that Thomas allowed a tear to seep down his cheek, knowing he'd done something that he would never forgive himself for.

"Are you alright?" Thomas said, trying to ignore the previous statement, though he knew he never would.

"I'm fine, Thomas," Newt replied, the words stinging yet again. It hurt more than anything for Thomas to hear his own name coming from Newt's mouth. It just didn't feel right. He decided to speak again.

"Newt, you're a terrible liar."

Then something unexpected happened...

•*•

Newt felt a pang in his stomach as he heard Thomas not only call him by his name, but accused him of lying immediately. This'll be easier than I initially thought. Of course, Thomas knows me too well. So surely he wouldn't expect this...

•*•

No one saw this coming. Not even Newt, to be quite honest. Thomas was definitely shocked at what he saw happened next.

"WELL HOW WOULD YOU FUCKING KNOW, EH? YOU'RE NEVER HERE ANYMORE THOMAS, YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO I AM ANYMORE! FOR GOD'S SAKE, ALL YOU DO IS HANG AROUND WITH HER. DON'T GIVE ME THAT LOOK, I'VE FUCKING SEEN YOU TWO SHUCK FACES SNOGGING IN THE DEADHEADS!!" Newt's expression softened as he finished, "I thought you loved me... Tommy."

Immediately, Thomas felt the need to explain himself. Explain everything. Everything. He just didn't know where to start. And so he began, going through and through all the events of the past three months, and why he did what he did, what was going through his head as he did it and so forth. Newt had long since calmed down by now, he didn't even care about the story Thomas was telling, but it came from his mouth, so he listened. He listened to every word that came from his mouth. He listened to the stutter in Thomas' voice every now and again. He saw Thomas' lip quiver as if he was on the verge of tears, and Newt decided that enough was enough. He grabbed Thomas and pulled him in tight. And that is when the tears started coming like a waterfall. Every drop came out, he held nothing back.

His tears were salty as they held one another tight, as if by letting go they'd lose the other. And though they'd only known each other for so little time, losing the other would make him want death itself to overtake his soul. Losing each other meant an actual piece of the other would die with him, and that was something he just couldn't deal with.

Newt opened his eyes to see his Tommy in tears too, so he moved his hand up to his face and wiped them all away. Each and every one.

"I thought I'd lost you," was all he could say as his breathing began to steady.

"I was always there, sweetie."

"What about Teresa?"

"I'll cross that bridge when I get to it, but for now I'm with you. And that's all i need."

The two stayed that way for a while, until Newt opened his eyes yet again to see it was nightfall and a figure in the doorway, a smirk plastered across the boy's face. Of course it had to be Minho. He gave Newt a thumbs up and a kissy face. Newt silently scoffed and mouthed, "Shut up, shuckface," before seeing Minho retreat to give him and his boyfriend some peace and quiet.

 **And there you have it! A _Newtmas_ one-shot for you guys. I did initially so this in 4 chapters (There For You) but I thought I'd do it as a one-shot too, because why not?**

 **Xxx**


End file.
